So, I’m watching TV the other day. This commercial comes on, there’s a couple in a row boat. The row boat is taking on water due to a leak in the bottom of the boat. The guy (the one with the oars) is looking around frantically to figure out a way to stop the boat from sinking. His companion, a shapely young woman, reaches into her purse and violá! She takes out a tampon and gingerly inserts it into the hole with the leak solving the problem.

I’m a guy.

I know from experience none of the ladies I’ve known relishes ‘the curse’ but, am I missing something here? What’s the inference of this spot? Is this woman supposed to be the McGyver of tampons? I’m thinking this spot was written by some dopey guy but, I could be wrong. I’m curious to know what women think when they see something like this — as a guy all I can say is that it would probably make for one truly bizarre date.

Then I did some searching:

It's not about how old you are.
It's not about what you do for a living.
It's not about being a mom or a career woman.

It's a way of being - a state of mind.

Pearl Girl - a woman who's sensual, confident and comfortable in her own skin.

Tampax celebrates a Pearl Girl's true essence and active lifestyle with Tampax Pearl Plastic - the innovative tampon that's ALL about keeping you out there, feeling fresh and feminine EVERY day of the month. With the incredible comfort and extraordinary protection of Tampax Pearl, the days of your period become like any other day.

Who writes this stuff?! Apparently this is supposed to be the ‘Pearl Girl’s’ buzz.

Then I look further and it appears that there’s some sort of faux email campaign about the damn things.

The things you miss out on being a guy.